Thursday, February 23, 2006
okay. we lost to plmgs ytd. 4-1. i guess everyone played their best. thanks tessa, for the compliment on ur blog. yupps. i just we'll all just hafta learn from our mistakes and work harder for nationals. snrs lost to plmgs today too. they played really well. though we lost. THERE WAS NO SHAME. everyone was there supporting and stuff. shermaine was like WOW. her determination was worthy of praise. she really fought hard. and won that pl girl. WOOOHOO. tmr got sports heats at vjc after school. then after heats gotta go down to vs for prize presentation. we came in third place. snrs came in second. hopefully we'll all get good draws.now. about my studies.i seriously have nvr felt so down b4. im really starting to as though im losing myself. i cant cope. im not use to sec2 life. ive already failed one test so far. we have had AT LEAST 15 CAs since the start of school already. its killing me. i feel the pressure and the stress to do well, if not my mum will go round comparing again. then ill just feel like a pathetic loser again. it seriously sucks. i dun care about what others get. whether they score higher or lower than me, it doesnt matter. ALL I WANT IS TO DO WELL. studying does nothing. i study and yet i dun get results i aim for. been sleeping 5 hours of sleep a day. no wonder i dun grow tall. because studies show that u grow when u sleep too. crap. seriously. i hardly get positive stuff coming my way. everyones saying how stupid i am. teachers are all getting fed up with our class. just thinking that im the vicechair next semester just makes me wanna DIE. ill nvr control them. yes im fat. yes im stupid. yes im ugly. yes i suck. yes i know all this. thanks for saying it right into my face. THANKS ALOT. HOW COMFORTINGi just really dunno who to turn to. no one really knows how i feel inside. the insecurities. i cry myself to sleep sometimes. my eyes tear in the car on the way to school. im just lost. screwed up. MY COMFORT ZONE IS GONE. ive nvr felt so alone and afraid b4. just screwed.
leaveeeeeeeee like everything else 7:30 AM
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